HARD TRANSITIONS

There are some hard transitions in life. In fact, at many transitions in life, we want to go back to the previous stage, because we know what to expect there and do not know what to expect of the one ahead. Someone once said that we go through all of life, at least transitional stages, as amateurs. You just get good at dealing with a stage, and another one comes.

As I near or am at another transition, it becomes hard. I am at a stage where I have more knowledge and wisdom (at least I think so) than ever before. And yet, my physical stamina and energy is waning. (Maybe I just need to take off some weight and exercise more [and eat better].)

For the reason of the white hair and the age, many think I "cannot cut the mustard anymore," and maybe there is truth to that. It is frustrating to know you have so much to give, and yet not to be able to give it or to feel that others will not give you the chance to give it anymore. I guess that is what we face as we face retirement.

I still have 5-8 years before full retirement. Still lots to give--even in retirement, though in different ways from before. But the transition seems to be occurring, at least in the minds of others.

At age 60, one is not supposed to like to play choruses on his guitar--but I do. At age 60, one is supposed to be set in their ways and "old-thinking," at least in the minds of some, but I don't consider myself that way--at least not TOO much. At age 60, one is not supposed to like to learn new things, but I still do. These are generalizations, but many in the world think this is the case, I believe.

So in some ways, I feel stuck by the mindsets of others--the stereotypes of others. Not yet to the next stage, (at least I don't think so) and yet there in the minds of many others. (Sometimes I am just too philosophical--part of my personality. For those of you aware of Myers-Briggs, I am INFP and the F is about equally T).

I think I have blogged about this a bit before, in a post I titled, "Too."

As I thought about the next stage today, though, I thought that love will enter into the picture too when the next stage comes. In the winter stage, we cannot DO what we once could. We cannot perform as we once did. We cannot produce for our company or church or ... as we once did. But maybe we will be loved for a different reason.

Maybe in the winter stage of life, we will be loved and accepted not for what we can DO for others, but for WHO we are, or who we have been. And maybe that is the best stage yet. Truly loved for who we are, not just for what we can do for others.

But I guess the final stage before the final transition is one where we are loved because of who we've been. Years ago, I had some friends dealing with aging parents. One Lutheran lady gave me a definition of alzheimers that I liked, and it helped me deal with aging parents and nursing homes and life being tough. She said, "Alzheimer's is when the mind has gone on to heaven but the body has not yet followed."

I am not yet to Alzheimer's (at least to my knowledge). I am not yet to retirement (though I am beginning to look forward to it). I still have lots to give--through mentoring, through challenging other, through thinking and encouraging and teaching (my spiritual gifts--the two latter). Physically I can't do what I could, but there is still lots of value within. But still it is frustrating when others do not see that or give you a chance for that.

Maybe winter will not be so bad. Loved for who I am; not for what I can do for others anymore.

And as the transitions come, any of them, (marriage, family, empty nest, career change, aging, disability, etc.) there is a need to "walk by faith, not by sight." Faith--the evidence of things not seen--Read Galatians 2:20 and Hebrews 11.

What hard transition are you going through? Walk by faith in God and not by what you can see (or others think they see in you--they could be wrong). "Trust in the LORD (Prov. 3:5-6).